Living Through The Trials Of Life

There are times in our lives where we need to step back from the negative and positive aspects in our lives and evaluate them in order to truly understand ourselves. Their is a notion in this society of living our lives to the fullest, everyday. Even though this is entirely justified because there is not a guarantee that you will have tomorrow but there also isn’t a guarantee that you won’t have tomorrow. Instead of rushing through your life so you can check off a bucket list, do something with quality and enjoy the moment you are in. I constantly remind myself that I am young; I am only nineteen. I remind myself that everything does not have to be done right now. There is time for the things that are meant to be done in my life, and I am here to remind you of this very same notion. As I sit back and observe the people around me, I see people over working themselves, complaining about their unhappiness, and how they do not have time for the things they actually want. You are the only one with the power to change something in your life. Instead of saying I can’t, go out and find the ways you can. It may not be today or tomorrow, but you can make it happen one day. Until then, pick out the things in your life that make you happy instead of consuming yourself with the negative that is present. Everybody has something going on in their life, but it is handled differently by everyone.

We are put through trials and tribulations through out our entire life for reasons we may never know, but they are meant to happen. Instead of constantly searching for answers, just ask the questions and live your life through the search. The answers will come to you when it is meant to happen. There will be things in your life that will point you to the answers of the questions you have asked or they will point you in the direction of the path to the answers. As cliche as it sounds, you just need to love the life you have been given, hardships and all.

A positive mindset is something that needs to be spread throughout our society. This is where life, change, and happiness can prevail. There will be times where you feel so deep in whatever may be going on in your life that there isn’t an end in sight, but one day it will end so you can move on, and move forward. Everything has an ending. Instead of planning for that end, be present in every moment even though it may be negative because there is much for you to learn during that time.  The trial you are going through right now will end and you will have a moment in your life where you can stop and say, you feel as though you can actually move forward. You may not be aware of the direction or the destination, but it is an adventure or journey you are meant to go through. You may not even know why you are going on this journey or what you are even looking for, but you must go with it. Have faith and confidence in who you are, so you can be pointed in the direction of where you are meant to be and actually find what you are searching for in life.

 

 

A Dream Of Happiness

 I met someone recently who reminded me that it is okay to dream big. It is okay to dream the way we did when we were children. We all lose sight of our big dreams as we get jaded with what we call reality. Dreams are our hopes and ambitions. Dreams make life feel as though we have something to strive for. Often more times than not, many people let the obstacles of life stand in their way but their is a big difference between giving up on a dream and starting a new one. There are some obstacles in life that can not be overcome but simply accepted. When we are faced with this type of obstacle, it is easy to stand still but in reality the best thing you can do is find the happiness that may lay with in this obstacle. Your dreams can change and they will, constantly but we can never stop dreaming. For me, my dreams give me a purpose. Whether they come true or not is entirely up to me. There may be some circumstances that can change the nature of my dream but I will always find something that makes me happy. When asked, most people will tell you that all they want from life is to be happy. Well, happiness is your perception. I have been through a lot of life changing experiences in the past two years and I never thought that I was going to feel happy or that things were going to work out for me but then I remembered that it is up to me to find those things that can make me happy. There are many things that I thought I would be doing or have right now but I don’t. My life is not where I thought it would be at this moment. However, I would not have wanted it to work out the way I wanted it to because I would not have learned so many things. Even though most of the past two years were negative, I learned a lot from my experiences and have grown from them. I am being honest when I say that I do not know what the future has in store for me but I do know that there is at least one thing that I can find happiness in and that is all anybody can ask for. So my advice for you, is to learn how to find joy and happiness in any situation.

Learn and grow through the positive and negative times with the act of happiness.

There Is A Reason

In Life we are bound to meet a lot of people, some positive, negative and neutral. Each person that we meet has a unique impact on who are and who we will become. However, most commonly with negative people, we ask ourselves: Why were these people in our lives and what was their or our purpose? In most cases it takes months or years after a person is gone in order to realize why they were there in the first place.

In order to understand why a person was meant to be in our life, we must first understand what we can learn from their presence. There is a life lesson that can be understood in any situation. When I was young, my parents got divorced and my mother abandoned myself and my siblings. It took a couple years to forgive and move on, as well as understand why I was meant to have her in my life only for a short time. The truth is, her leaving made me a stronger and motivated person. I was motivated to do good for myself and my family. In addition, her absence improved my relationship with my father. There is a lot of things that we can learn about our selves through the absence of someone who held value in our life at some point. In order to understand the reason behind someones value, we must learn to let go and move on. Letting go of what my mother did to me and my family was one of the hardest things that I have ever had to do because she hurt us so much, but it was not going to do me any good by holding on to the actions of one person. Even if you feel as though someone does not deserve your forgiveness, you must forgive any ways especially for yourself. It is not healthy to hold on to negative things of the past or the present. Only through the act of forgiving, will you truly move on and grow from any situation. For all the people you have gained and lost, will there be a new lesson to make you stronger. Oddly enough, you should appreciate the negative things that are thrown at you in life, because there is a reason waiting to be discovered.

An Innocent Chance

There is something to be said about a child’s innocence. This concept can be understood in many different ways but I am referencing a child’s ability to give second chances as well as their ability to see good in everybody they meet in spite of the behavior or treatment of a person.

Why does it become harder as we age to see the good in people? It could be the fact that past circumstances make us jaded. I believe that it completely depends on the situation whether you can allot a second chance to someone who has done wrong to you or those you love. As I see this childlike innocence in my younger sister who is 9, I wonder if she really believes in giving second chances and truly sees something good that no one else can, or whether she does not fully comprehend the severity of peoples actions and words. This forgiving innocence, however, is slowly fading from my little brother who is almost 11. He tends to be more like me in this aspect: I like to evaluate the situation in order to fully understand why I would not be capable of allotting a person a second chance. In a recent article I addressed the importance of choosing the people you surround yourself with very carefully and this concept is completely relevant to deciding whether a person is worth a second chance. I recently had to decide whether to put more effort into a relationship or cut all ties. My decision was that even though this relationship was important to someone I care about deeply, I just could not aid the relationship any further. I have had a lot of negative in my life. So much so that it is hard for me to pin point the good. Even though it may have disappointed somebody I love, I truly felt as though I could not handle any more negative aspects, treatment or feelings in my life. A wise woman once told me that I can not control another persons’ actions but only my own, and that I could decide to separate myself from the negative aspects even if it means separating my self from somebody I love for awhile.

Negativity will always be present in everybody’s life but we all can control the way we react. My father once told me that he felt as though life was kicking his ass, well I told him, to kick it back. That is the only way anybody can move forward. In spite of hard times and negative things, we can always kick back with love and life and happiness. This is the only way to beat the darkness that may lurk.

The People Impact

Whether we like it or not, the people we surround ourselves with reflect who we are and what we stand for. This very reason is why it is extremely important to be very picky when it comes to friends, co-workers, and peers. The people around us can have either a positive, neutral, or negative effect.

When a person has a positive effect, they tend to push and motivate you to do things that will help you be a better person or fulfill a goal. However, that is not the limit. People have a huge impact in our lives, whether it is short term or long term. I have only a few people who I am close to that have a positive impact. With out them, I probably would not be writing my blog today. These people help me realize my dream and give me a drive to keep moving forward, but they also make me see reality.

With being polar opposite, it is not a surprise that a negative effect can hinder many aspects in your life. The people that have a negative effect are toxic human beings and only care about their personal gain. Now I am not an expert. I am simply sharing from my experiences. Sometimes it is not in our control whether a person has a negative or positive effect on ourselves, but what you do with that person is entirely up to you and only you. The decision has to come from you that this person will not negatively effect you, simply because you deserve better than that. As well as the fact that they, the negative effecting person, does not deserve a reaction from you. The best thing to do is rise above it. I know it sounds totally cliche, but thats the truth and that is life.

Say it with me: I will not let anybody negatively effect. I deserve better than that. I deserve happiness and love.